WHEN MACET HAS YOU BY THE BALLS

MISSION (IMPOSSIBLE): TO UNDERSTAND JAKARTA’S WHO, WHAT, WHERE AND…WHY?

I am a new expatriate in Jakarta here to share with you all the mind-blowing, jaw-dropping, and hilarious experiences in PRINCESS JAKARTA – an alluring creature of beauty, excitement, contradictions and traffic jams.

Jakarta is a PRINCESS – a city not yet dominating the throne, but rapidly rising to the top.  Sultry, spontaneous and surprising, Princess Jakarta is a bundle of contradictions.

Princess Jakarta is complicated. Full to the brim with a plethora of dwellers, diggers, devourers and decadence, she’s turbulent, unpredictable, and sometimes down right dirty.  After decades of occupation, development and a carousel of leaders, she’s a smorgasbord of complexes.   And under the weight of modern progress, the demands of a growing populace, and the challenge of change,  she is struggling and self-destructive.

But don’t give up! Princess Jakarta is a rough diamond with magical potential.

Jakarta is strong;  gaining  momentum, courage and a competitive edge.  And her charm, decadence and world of comforts are oh so very alluring.   But, as a contradictory creature of beauty, Princess Jakarta has us baffled with what makes her tick.

For advice on how to handle (Princess) Jakarta’s unique characteristics, key language and other phenomena baffling to anyone new to Jakarta, read ahead.  Let my writings be a guide to your ultimate Jakarta escapades, basic local communication, or just simply your guilty fix of cringe worthy, awkward and pants-pissing experiences to point a finger and laugh at.

Whether you’re wondering what makes Jakarta tick, why the traffic never moves or if you’re just sitting down hiding from the daily grind on a couch in Starbucks, sit back, relax, and have a read of my baffling, and mostly embarrassing observations experiences, and encounters with PRINCESS JAKARTA.

If anything, at least you’ll be comforted that there’s someone else out there in this big city with worse etiquette and expatriate graces than yourself.

Cheers and enjoy the upcoming madness!